You can't run forever

Less than four weeks to go until Brighton and training hasn't been going brilliantly. I've missed a couple of long runs and I just hope they don't turn out to be crucial. Think I've kept the intensity high enough that I should be okay. And that missing fear factor makes such a difference. I'll line up for Brighton knowing I'll have a great time even if I don't need to run a great time!

Although I haven't been doing all my runs I have been getting my mental approach right by mixing with Olympians! First on international women's day some time spent with Amy Williams and Mhairi Spence who shared their stories of heroics and hard work. Then with my best running buddy Jules we went along to Dame Kelly Holmes Running Hub breakfast. If you don't know Kelly is training hard for the London Marathon and is raising money for 5 charities (http://uk.virginmoneygiving.com/team/KellysHeros) Now I've no doubt that she will smash London but to hear this legend share stories of long runs and training that we can all relate to and to find myself discussing nutrition and long run fuel with Kelly was surreal and wonderful. Plus I got to catch up with some UKrunchat pals - it was a perfect morning! 

But I was left with a lasting legacy as Dame Kelly talked about her experience of depression and self-harm and how this affected her and makes her determined to speak out and raise money now. During the drive home I found myself opening up to Jules about my own experiences and how some of that has shaped my running and my desire to ensure I enjoy Brighton. I'm always aware you never truly know someones background unless they share it with you. I take this with me to never judge or second guess someones motives but I'm not so good at sharing my story. But as Jules and I have run side by side for many hundreds of miles now it felt totally right. Plus that drive which Dame Kelly is showing for her charities can help me drive my way around Brighton without falling apart as I did last time. It can then drive me on to Berlin to a possible PB and further to Beachy and beyond for new challenges.  Thanks to Jules for listening and whoever you are don't be afraid to open up. Someone will always listen and you don't have to run 26.2 miles with them to make it okay xx

My life has been a rollercoaster at times but I'm lucky and I'm alive. And now I'm fit and healthy and

able to run and it seems inspire others to run too. On Sunday the Selfie Sunday Runners of Maidstone hit the streets of Maidstone for the Heart of Kent Hospice Run Day - 5k, 10k or a half marathon but all together in our love of running. Our love of selfies and our love of cheering the very last person over that finish line -  especially when they battled hard for it (Megan!).  Running at the speed of chat became a joke between Jules and I but now we wear it with pride as a badge, actually a shirt, of honour.  

The next four weeks will tick by and soon Brighton will be here. I will run that sea front with the biggest smile this year - no matter what happens. Whatever challenge you've faced to get to that start line make sure you enjoy your moment. A friend said to me before Brighton last year "remember that moment in Brighton years ago - now look at you. You're amazing - marathon or no marathon" - this year that's going to drive me round. We're all amazing. We're all special. We can all beat the demons and when we can't? We can run - surrounded by friends and snapping selfies. After all - what other kind of running is there? 

So good luck Dame Kelly Holmes - you'll be amazing at London and I'll think of you when I'm at mile 26 in Brighton as you've helped me already know I'll get to that finish line with a smile!